1L content to park on the street

Gregg Wurzler, The Stool

As the academic year winds to a close, 1L Adrienne James has begun to convince herself that she doesn’t want to park in the Summit lot when school reconvenes next year. “It’s good exercise to walk to and from your car,” said James. “It gets your blood flowing, and it gives you some time to decompress a little after a hard day at school.”

Classmates of James disagree. “yeah, I heard her saying that same thing during the winter,” 1L Mike Dorian told us. “She’s a moron – it sucks ass to have to walk up and down that damn street every day. It’s usually cold, windy, and God forbid you park too close to a driveway or a corner! Holy Jesus the cops come out of the woodwork when that happens, but they can’t seem to cut down on the muggings. Whatever.”