Mary Atkins, The Stool
When 3L Roberto Domingez had a question after his Sales class last week, he was shocked that the person to whom he was talking was the same prof he had been listening to all semester. “I sit towards the back, and as I was walking up there it was like he was transforming,” said Domingez. “So I get up there, and the dude was super weird looking. I don’t know how to describe it – he just looked really different than he normally does during class. It threw me so bad I forgot what my question was for a couple seconds.”
2L Sheila Mowaddes had a similar experience in her evidence class. “I went up to the front during the break to ask something, and [the prof] looked so different I ended up just making eye contact, smiling, then kept walking. He must think I’m an idiot, but at that point anything he had to say about hearsay would have been drowned out by his liver spots in my head. Oh well.”
Friday, November 30, 2007
1L grateful to finally have something to talk about
Hans Olo, The Stool
Family gatherings like Thanksgiving and Festivus have proven to be full of awkward conversations for 1L Beth Page, but this year is different. “There are no more strained pauses,” said Page. “Usually during Thanksgiving dinner I would be sitting with one of my Mom’s cousins that I see like once a year, and after the ‘how’s work’ chit-chat died down my mind would race for something – anything – we could talk about. Finally, we have something.”
Law school has been the great social situation salve for Page. When the conversation dimmed, the ubiquitous “how’s school going” question served as a conversational spotlight. “God I loved hearing that question,” said Page. “It ate up enough time for someone else to join in so I could get out after a while without having to make up an excuse.”
Other students have had similar experiences. “I used to just skip going to any family function where drinking isn’t acceptable simply because I have nothing in common with most of them,” said 2L Bill Oslund. “But since I started school there’s always something to talk about. Of course now they expect me to help them solve their absurd legal problems, but whatever. At least I can leave my flask home most of the time.”
Family gatherings like Thanksgiving and Festivus have proven to be full of awkward conversations for 1L Beth Page, but this year is different. “There are no more strained pauses,” said Page. “Usually during Thanksgiving dinner I would be sitting with one of my Mom’s cousins that I see like once a year, and after the ‘how’s work’ chit-chat died down my mind would race for something – anything – we could talk about. Finally, we have something.”
Law school has been the great social situation salve for Page. When the conversation dimmed, the ubiquitous “how’s school going” question served as a conversational spotlight. “God I loved hearing that question,” said Page. “It ate up enough time for someone else to join in so I could get out after a while without having to make up an excuse.”
Other students have had similar experiences. “I used to just skip going to any family function where drinking isn’t acceptable simply because I have nothing in common with most of them,” said 2L Bill Oslund. “But since I started school there’s always something to talk about. Of course now they expect me to help them solve their absurd legal problems, but whatever. At least I can leave my flask home most of the time.”
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Hiring of new dean ends student’s parking spot loophole
Snivelsome Oldbean, The Stool
Most students and faculty were happy to hear of the hiring of Eric Janus as Dean of Students at William Mitchell. One student in particular, however, was not so thrilled. 2L Dean Jannisek had to give up an incredible parking spot.
“For the last few months, I’ve had the best parking spot in the lot,” said Jannisek. “It’s the one marked ‘reserved for Dean of the College’, and it sucks that I have to give it up!”
As it turns out, Jannisek was the only person – student or faculty – with the first name “Dean”. “It was a loophole, for sure, but I’ve been spending all of my time here learning how to argue,” said Jannisek. “It wasn’t hard to explain to security that I was, technically, the ‘Dean of the College’”.
Jannisek was dismayed to drive into the William Mitchell parking lot and find that his spot had been taken. “It’s a long walk from the Grotto lot, and it’s starting to get cold,” said Jannisek. “I’ll just have to pony up the cash for a parking permit or find a new loophole, I guess.”
Most students and faculty were happy to hear of the hiring of Eric Janus as Dean of Students at William Mitchell. One student in particular, however, was not so thrilled. 2L Dean Jannisek had to give up an incredible parking spot.
“For the last few months, I’ve had the best parking spot in the lot,” said Jannisek. “It’s the one marked ‘reserved for Dean of the College’, and it sucks that I have to give it up!”
As it turns out, Jannisek was the only person – student or faculty – with the first name “Dean”. “It was a loophole, for sure, but I’ve been spending all of my time here learning how to argue,” said Jannisek. “It wasn’t hard to explain to security that I was, technically, the ‘Dean of the College’”.
Jannisek was dismayed to drive into the William Mitchell parking lot and find that his spot had been taken. “It’s a long walk from the Grotto lot, and it’s starting to get cold,” said Jannisek. “I’ll just have to pony up the cash for a parking permit or find a new loophole, I guess.”
“Humor edition” of student newspaper is unsurprisingly not funny
Duff McHammer, The Stool
When the William Mitchell Opinion released their first ham-fisted attempt at a “humor edition” last week, its “editors” expected to hear gales of laughter filtering through the hallowed halls of the school. Instead, they were met with uncomfortable silence or outright anger.
“I thought it was really funny” said one Opinion editor. “We showed it to our friends and parents before printing it and they all said it was good too, so I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Average students found the humor edition somewhat less entertaining than did its writers. “I didn’t know it was possible to take a shit on a piece of paper and print it, but here it is in front of me,” said 1L Sam Kloent while perusing one of the Opinion’s photo-copied pages. “I’m embarrassed for them, actually.”
While The Stool is often shabbily written and unfunny as well, Stool staffers at least know they suck. And, as anyone who grew up with a television in the 80’s will tell you, knowing is half the battle.
When the William Mitchell Opinion released their first ham-fisted attempt at a “humor edition” last week, its “editors” expected to hear gales of laughter filtering through the hallowed halls of the school. Instead, they were met with uncomfortable silence or outright anger.
“I thought it was really funny” said one Opinion editor. “We showed it to our friends and parents before printing it and they all said it was good too, so I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Average students found the humor edition somewhat less entertaining than did its writers. “I didn’t know it was possible to take a shit on a piece of paper and print it, but here it is in front of me,” said 1L Sam Kloent while perusing one of the Opinion’s photo-copied pages. “I’m embarrassed for them, actually.”
While The Stool is often shabbily written and unfunny as well, Stool staffers at least know they suck. And, as anyone who grew up with a television in the 80’s will tell you, knowing is half the battle.
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