Professor Pannier shaken after nightmare

Hans Olo, The Stool

Following waking up in a veritable pool of sweat brought on by a particularly vivid nightmare last night, the Professor recounted his experience to a Stool insider.

“I was in Hell, and I was being forced to memorize the New York City phone book,” a visibly shaken Pannier told us. “I kept trying to point out to the demons and imps who were torturing me that I could simply look up the information in the very book I was being forced to memorize whenever I needed it, but they would hear none of it.”

Dreams about completely pointless, utterly useless wastes of time such as memorizing large amounts of material taken from easily referenced sources is a theme that haunts the dreams of many people connected to Pannier. 2L Clay Boyton gave us his thoughts on this phenomenon. “When I have a dream like that, it usually lasts between 50 and 100 minutes. They tend to subside within nine to ten months.”