“Guitar Hero” Spurs New Interest in Career Development Office

On Wednesday, the Office of Career and Professional Development installed the hugely popular interactive video game “Guitar Hero,” as well as a 50” plasma television. Students, faculty, and staff immediately took interest in the game, distracting everyone from William Mitchell’s new position as “Worst Law School in the Nation” according to U.S. News and World Report.

Dean Janus was heard commenting, “We, as well as many other law schools in the fourth tier, disagree with the way the Report ranks schools. Have no fear, we’re taking this very seriously. Scholarships will be given out to even more minorities... wait... what is that?”

William Mitchell’s President proceeded to push Brangelia Hugenplow out of the way of the big screen TV, grabbed her guitar, and shouted, “DOWDAL! THIS THING IS BITCHIN’!”

When The Stool asked Assistant Director of Career Development Shannon Wellmonth about the video game’s presence in the office, she had nothing but nice things to say, “You see, this office has been attempting to homogenize the student body’s resumes for the last decade. We’ve been hugely successful. Everyone uses the same font, size, experiences, and page design, but that “Interests” area has always been problematic. We figure with “Guitar Hero” in the office, we’ll get everyone hooked and then those “Interests” will eventually all be one and the same.”

After peering through Career Development’s window, Dean Dees was heard muttering to herself, “I’ll show those assholes...” The Dean then walked into the Multicultural Office and yelled, “SHARON! ORDER US A PROJECTION SCREEN AND GET “DANCE, DANCE REVOLUTION!” LET’S SHOW THOSE CRACKAS WHAT OUR KIDS CAN DO!”