Diversity Week ’08 – Resounding Success for Horsefuckers

Abigail Wilson, The Stool

William Mitchell’s Diversity Week ’08 acted as the death knell for diversity… unless you were a Horsefucker. With a meager showing by almost all of the WMCL “diversity organizations,” the Horsefucker Law Student Society’s programming put other groups’ activities to shame.

One Multicultural Office hanger-on was spotted in a stairwell at Noon on Wednesday putting up signs for the Annual Soul Food Festival. Said festival had begun one hour previously at 11AM and was scheduled to end at 1PM. “We definitely dropped the ball on this one, but, man, those Horsefuckers sure got their shit together! On Monday, their dick-slapping contest really depleted the interest in the Asian Law Student Association’s international wears that were set up in that hallway where no one goes. You know? That one where they’ve got the pictures of those old fuckers hanging up? Yeah! That one.”

Diversity Week’s one successful event, the Cesar Chavez dinner, also felt the looming presence of the HLSS. One member of the Latino Law Student Association, who chose to remain anonymous for fear of Horsefucker retaliation, commented, “They just stood at the back of the auditorium. They looked pretty disgruntled that even one organization had been able to pull off a proper event.”

Horsefucker Vice-President, Billy Clinksworth told The Stool, “They got one past us. But no worries. Next year, the Horsefuckers, being the underrepresented population du jour, will really be able to take over Diversity Week 110%!”